Is this some evolutionary flaw in women or some mistake we end up making over and over again? So I’m going to tell you about how married men try to hit on you in the first place.
You may know that a charming married man’s taken already, but if you find that he gives you a few second glances or a roguish smile, it would be pretty hard for you to overlook that.
And this happens to be the predominant perspective most people have.
Men on the other hand, are a completely different ballgame.You see, unlike women who experience intense surges of affection as soon as they meet a guy, men experience a phase of emotions when they meet a woman.Dear Antonella, I wrote about this in a chapter of Why You’re Still Single called:”Diminishing Returns.” In it, a woman wonders why a man would invest time, energy and money in somebody he might not even care about.(There was originally a great joke about oral sex here that was later removed by editors, but the point remains the same.) A guy can want to fall in love, tell you you’re beautiful, treat you like a queen, and ravish you in the bedroom, and it still doesn’t give any indication that he’s actually interested. He’ll call you as soon as possible to make plans to see you again. Any other excuse, as pointed out ad nauseum in He’s Just Not That Into You, is meaningless.You’re not wrong, Antonella, for wanting to find some clarity in your relationship.
It’s normal that, over the course of a month, your feelings would start to deepen and develop.
For starters, both of you should be very comfortable with each other.
You should be comfortable enough to reveal your stupid side and yet laugh about it together, instead of covering up your flaws or feeling embarrassed about it when you’re together.
Believe me, if he’s calling you every day and wants to see you four nights a week, you can be pretty sure that he’s serious about you.
On the other hand, if you see him once a week and he only communicates with you by text message, I wouldn’t get too excited about him.
Every man is different and enjoys different things about a woman.