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He laughs, says ‘wow, that’s a hell of a line’ but admits he has a girlfriend.

He says if he didn’t he’d have given me his number, though, and I leave, pleased I appear to have made his night. But it gives me the chance to establish he has an accent so, after being given a lighter and cigarette I don’t need, I chat to Pedro and Flávio about Portugal. Effectiveness – 7/10 – Really good but best to use it if you actually smoke…

Over 18's only to use these phone lines with the bill payer’s permission, all live calls are recorded in compliance with Phone Pay Plus regulations.